- Marshall Goldsmith
I must say that I LOVE the people around me. I truly ENJOY all the Morning Motivator readers. Why this GUSHING show of affection? It spawns from the FEEDBACK I receive from you all. The most CHALLENGING part of making changes in your life, is making sure they are changes others can see.
Interestingly, many people feel very ACCOMPLISHED regarding changes they have made in their life. I APPLAUD those that have made the changes they felt necessary for themselves to be happy. I am CONFUSED sometimes by the people that make changes to please others, yet never receive recognition from others for it. Why is this?
He above quote makes a good REFERENCE to this disconnect. Often, we ASSUME (dangerous word) that they changes we are making are the "right" changes to remedy a solution, improve a relationship or achieve our growth goal. How would we know what needs to OCCUR in order for this positive change to be accepted? Commonly, the CHANGE we are making is to affect the action, feelings or thoughts of someone else. Shouldn't they be INVOLVED in the change too then?
2 DEGREE SUCCESS STEP:
In my studies I have found that 2 fail points commonly occur in CHANGE MANAGEMENT.
One, there is no COMMUNICATION of the REAL challenge that is affecting the relationship. You often make the change without KNOWING what to change. Seems silly to shoot for a goal that you don't have CLEARLY defined, eh?
Secondly, the change maker fails to gain BUY IN/ACCEPTANCE from the person they are seeking to change for. Much like breaking a bad habit of being tardy to work, you must ACHIEVE an awareness and recognition of your focus from the person you are seeking to showcase this change to. If you boss BELIEVES you are late all the time, you change the habit, yet they never knew about your efforts... it's likely the will not come to the REALIZATION of your change on their own. Often, that person has already "written you off."
In order for you to ACHIEVE the RESULTS you seek in making changes - you must clearly IDENTIFY the behavior that needs adjustments and gain AWARE ACCEPTANCE of the change from the people that are affected by your behavior. By establishing the proper platform and audience... your change will affect EVERYONE that is involved!
Cheers,
Zach
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